I find myself wondering, time and time again, where women got their dating style from. We learn how to cook from watching our mothers and grandmothers in the kitchen. We learn how to interact with men from being around our male family members. Most of the stuff we learn is by osmosis kinda. You know...it just happens without direction or structure because we are INVOLVED in it.
And dating is unnatural to us for this very reason.
We usually pick up dating from seeing the male/female relationships we have private access to. You see your mother and father interact and you think that's how it goes.
You see your older brother as playa, playa and you think to yourself...I would never let a dude play me like that.
Dating is hard to learn.
Men and women date differently as it SHOULD be. There are different kinds of women for different stages of a man's life. When he's not in the mood for anything serious he knows to stick to a certain "type" of woman. He knows where to look for her and how to play her.
Like a fiddle.
Consequently he also knows the type of woman he can NOT deal with during this stage and usually...he's quite honest with her about it.
If a man senses that he can't play around with you and yet RESPECTS and LIKES you...he will tell you flat out. "I'm not looking for anything right now."
And he will MEAN it.
And now...the ball is in YOUR court. You can either act like a lady...or NOT.
A SMART lady will know that hey...I've got options and I don't need to hang around with this dude cuz he just TOLD me the truth and I need to listen to him cuz hey...how often does a dude REALLY tell you he's trying to get all he can get if he's trying to get something from YOU?
If he thought you were dumb or a chickenhead (what they call women they use) he would still try and USE YOU. He would still string you along and have you thinking that there could be something there cuz he knows that is what you hope, wish and DESIRE.
Unfortunately...to him...you're a chickenhead.
Now..being a chickenhead to him might not make you a chickenhead to others...so you need to know you're in COMPLETE control here.
I find it funny that some of the most professional of women would balk at the thought that someone considers them a chickenhead. Why?
Cuz they think it's a hood thing.
Um...no. A chickenhead is a woman a dude knows he can use up and she will just keep running and running behind him just like a chicken with it's head cut off.
If a dude tells you he's not looking for anything it's his first time acknowledging that you might NOT be a chickenhead.
If you don't LISTEN to him and act like he didn't say that...then you're crossing over the border and ain't nothing good coming after.
To be continued...