Why come when I have a MAJOR deadlines tomorrow can I find fifty million gazillion things to do other than what I need to be doing? Yall know I am NOT the one to be doing all that cleaning but I'll be damned if I've been dusting and folding ish this morning when I KNOW I got ish to do! WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?????????????
In our development, I'm the candy lady. I am well known for showing up at the park and putting juice boxes and individual snacks on a bench in the park. The parents know this cuz our development is small (75 homes) and there is one way in and one way out. Everyone pretty much knows OF everyone and if you're dealing with the kids...you really KNOW everyone.
Miss Monica loves the kids.
As cheeky azz Erica B. has told yall...I'm kinda the "kid whisperer" and kids flock to me. I have never known why because you know I'm not the person who will let a kid get away with anything and correct them quickly. For some reason...this doesn't turn kids off me and they just keep coming back for more.
I once wrote about a cousin that was a "reckless azz ninja." That is, he was one of those dudes who did not resist the allure of the fasts - fast money, fast women, and fast cars. Despite his upbringing, he ended up in and out of jail, running the streets, and posturing as if he was auditioning for a hip hop music video. I remember writing how pissed off I was at him, and dudes like him, when my sister called one day to ask if I'd heard that he'd been released from jail. I immediately though, "That punk will be back in jail by the weekend." I was wrong. He was shot and killed the day after his release. That was the real reason my sister called... to tell me he'd been killed outside a club by some dude named Frogman.
On Thursday afternoon, Michael Jackson died. This past weekend has been chock full of video tributes and MJ tributes. I logged into Facebook on Friday and it seemed like everybody and their grandma talked about how they were jamming to MJ in tribute to his life. In tribute, they said. In remembrance, they said. Out of respect, they said. People everywhere went on to extol all of Mike's virtues and accomplishments and how his life had been the soundtrack of various points in their lives.
When my cousin's eulogy was given, I wondered who in the hell they were talking about. My cousin, the strong-armed robber, carjacker, drug dealer, statutory raper, had a big heart??? He was shy and unassuming?? He went to church every Sunday and fed the homeless?? Please. The only thing generous he did with food was to call some innocent man a chicken, and then pepper him with assault. The preacher summed it up that in death, you remember the good about a person and celebrate their lives and don't talk ill about someone who is no longer around to defend themselves. A chorus of “Amens” rang out.
On Friday, Black folks' weren't talking about how MJ took pictures with little boys with no shirts on. Nor how he had such issues with his self-image that he totally destroyed his face. Nor how he dangled his newborn son from a hotel window or the enormous debt and financial mismanagement that riddled his life. Why?? 'Cause we was too busy celebratin' and tributin' and payin respect and whatnot. In my eyes, only talking about the good is no tribute at all. It's revisionism. That's like cooking out on Memorial Day, but not talking about soldiers' dying. That ain't a tribute... that's just a reason to not go to work and put some ribs on.
When a person passes, that is the time to celebrate the good AND bad. That is a time to reflect on the life the person lived so that those of us still here can learn something and apply it for the benefit of all those we love. Was MJ the greatest performer ever? Yes. Was he a musical genius? Yes. Did he have issues with self-esteem and drugs? Yes. Is he an example of the effects of child abuse? Yes. Was he inappropriate with little boys? Yes. As such, there are lessons to learn from his life.
Like it or not, MJ brought the topic of child molestation to the public eye for discussion. And that dialogue was needed... he single-handedly changed "Don't talk to strangers" to "Jimmy, no one is allowed to touch you in your special place. If it ever happens, you come tell me immediately, ok?" MJ was the first person that made me ask "Why doesn't he want to be Black?” He was my generation's introduction to plastic surgery. And I'd never heard of vitiligo until MJ. He contributed more to our lives than sparkly gloves, zipper jackets, and songs we could sing at school with our white classmates who knew nothing about Club Nouveau or Big Daddy Kane. So, to pay tribute to him, we have to remember his life in totality... not just do a moonwalk and remember Off The Wall playing at the 1986 family reunion.
My cousin did not help old ladies across the street, he mugged them on the corner. His life is (not was, IS) a cautionary tale about what happens when you choose the wrong friends and don't have enough confidence to stand on your own. His life warns what happens when you take shortcuts to riches at the expense of hard work, patience, and morality. My cousin was shot dead because he owed drug money to some ninja named Frogman. I will remember that just as much as I'll remember eating Good Humor ice cream on his front porch. That is paying tribute.
My mother is a cancer survivor. When she goes, I will remember her doting on me as a child just as much as I will remember her bald-headed and vomiting during chemo. Why should I forget the bad times?? Her life is a testament of strength and courage and faith and love. Why do I just want to remember the love part? What if we just remembered the "good parts" about Jesus... just the healing and water-to-wine stuff.... none of that bad crucifying stuff. That is no tribute. That is not honoring. It is impossible to pay your respects to someone without considering the troubles they had and how you can make life better for yourself and others by taking heed of the lessons that person's life teaches.
The first album I ever bought was Thriller. Last year, I bought the Thriller 25th anniversary CD with the Motown "moonwalk" Billie Jean performance on it. I pulled that CD out this past weekend and jammed to MJ. Ya know, in tribute. While out doing yard work, I contemplated his life and all the things I learned from watching him unravel over the course of three decades. And I thought of my cousin and how he'd unraveled too. Covered in sweat and grass clipping, I came inside and looked forward to the day when I can dance to P.Y.T. with my children and tell them stories from my childhood about the Good Humor bars with my cousin. And how I can teach them that their Blackness is beautiful, that they are strong and smart and don't have to let anyone else define them, that their bodies are not to be violated, and that if they ever get in a rut or need someone to talk to, Daddy is here. Because "where there is love, I'll be there."
Whenever I'm somewhere I NEED to be in order to learn more about what I want to do in life or meet people who could help me further my dream...you will see me solo.
Much like when I was dating, I learned quickly that I don't fare well traveling in a pack of people. ESPECIALLY in a pack of people who don't know me and I don't know them.
I'm not trying to have the first impression of me marred by some dumb ish someone with me was doing cuz the person I'm meeting does NOT know just how well I know that person so they have no way of knowing that the ignent ish they just did or said ain't have ish to do with me.
Again...I work ALONE.
I don't need a crew.
I don't need someone to run interference. I'm good.
When I was in Miami I was doing my one, two as I'm known to do. When I'm casually leaning on a wall with dark shades on I'm really paying VERY close attention to what's going on. I pick up really quickly who it is I may benefit from chatting with. I'd seen these guys and made note of something "special" about them and added them to my mental list of people I needed to chat with. I wasn't trying to get at them during a crowd but I knew by the appreciative glance my way that they'd be susceptible speaking to me later.
Yall know I can look cute when need be and thanks to 1969, I had the perfect daytime, INSIDE, Miami glow. (Outside I looked a hot, moist, greezy mess!)
The next day I saw one of the guys as I was sitting outside...ALONE chilling. A couple of chicks I'd met earlier were passing by and stopped to speak as I stopped old boy by being that brand of housewife-Southern Belle-country child I so love being. He was laughing and gave me some info and we go back and forth for a few.
All eyes on us.
He's comfortable, I'm comfortable. I ain't no threat.
Then...one of the chicks with the group of chicks I'd met earlier brought her BIG MOUTH, LOUD AS FUG, UNFORTUNATE FEATURE AND BAD BUILT HAVING AZZ OVER AND GOT ALL UP IN THE MIDDLE OF OUR CONVO giving him her card talking bout she dis, dat and the other all loud and shit. My gotdamn face scrunched up badder than Prince Ziggy's eating broccoli...like...AW HELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL NO! WHAT IN THE HELL IS THIS SHIT??????????????? YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUGGING KIDDING ME? WHAT FUGGING ROCK DID YOU COME UP FROM UNDER?
The kid was PISSED!
TO SAY THE LEAST.
With my face all scrunched up something AWFUL I looked at her and let him go cuz he had SHUT.THE.HELL.DOWN.
As he should have. His face was more closed than Circuit City down the street. Yup...BANKRUPT. He looked at me and my jacked up looking azz face and made his decision to get the HELL up outta there.
And he bounced.
I tagged her ugly azz and let her know in no uncertain terms to stay her rude loud azz the hell away from me. That shit was inappropriate and tacky and just...EW! I was so mad I couldn't even be gracious to that heffa. What I DIDN'T say was straight up written ALL OVER MY DAMN FACE! (Hell...I know I don't have to describe the look on my face. Yall know the brand of bitch I can be.)
I saw that heffa one additional time after that and threw her a look of such disdain that I hope it stays with her a long, long time and makes her rethink her method of "networking" for the good of all mankind in this industry.
I saw old boy later that day and several times during the rest of the time I was there. I got an invite to some stuff they are doing and I met his boss, the big guy, who gave me his card and told me to contact him. I'm about to do that now as well as send out thank you notes and emails to all the lovely people I met while there. I kinda wish I had old girl's info too so I could send her an envelope full of dirt with a big azz rock in the middle of it.
The way I am...I usually make the contact...set the tone and then introduce anyone that is around AFTER I've gotten what I need out of the convo. Don't be honing in on my ish. I WORK ALONE! And 99.9% of the time I give away ALL of the VIP tickets to stuff I get invited to cuz I'd rather have a quiet dinner with my husband and spend the night laughing with him.
When you are networking...do you fare better working solo or with a crew?
That's for everyone who made it through the 14 day challenge! Now we want the REAL deal. Let's see...out of over 40 people who initially said they were down I think only about 12 stuck it out to the end so yeah...that is HUGE!
Who was in from the beginning? Glad you asked! LOL!
dmac, Britt, Erica B. , missmajestic, les, Beloved Nerd Girl, mellow, Kara, Rian, The Lady Girl, msdrella, Journey78, Angie, Hostess, Pinky, 1969, mon, fullmoonoffaith, Krys, Beautifully Complex, Lossie, obikai, pmichael, Newams, Felicity, peachberry, ENicole, bangeeb, c, Daviece, The Ice Queen, Jen, SimplyB, Keelah, jazzy894, Donna, bella, Kels74, kera, juli, & akilah. I'm sure I missed a few flipping back and forth to the original post: The Tribe Summer 14 Day Challenge. LOL!
1. How much weight did you lose?
2. If you cheated...when did you cheat and with what?
3. Did you find any new foods and snacks to add to your menus?
4. Did you LEARN anything new about food?
5. Will you change anything about your diet?
6. What was the easiest part of the challenge?
7. What was the hardest part of the challenge?
8. For those of you who "signed up" but couldn't do it...what did you find to be so hard about it?
New Edition opening singing Mr. Jackson WITH BOBBY BROWN?????????? HOT.HOT.HOT! Um...Pocahontas vest? Um...no. Nerp. Imma need folks not to try Michael Jackson age 10 falsetto and think that's a tribute. Wait...I spoke too soon...seems like there are too many of them on stage. Why he holding a guitar? He can't play!
Lawd...I'd rather have CNN do a tribute I think and yall KNOW how much I loves me some CNN.
Also...so um...Latoya Luckett REALLY got punked huh? She couldn't perform INSIDE...but yeah...you can get down all day in the 105 degree heat playa! LOL!
Jamie Foxx...hmmmmm....is this gonna be disrespectful? Better not be. Cuz Imma get pissy. You don't speak ill of the dead. It's classless in my opinion cuz they can't defend themselves.
Cuz they are DEAD!
I have a feeling Jamie woulda done well on Broadway. :)
I can't see Jamie Foxx anymore without seeing his last character. I just see that hair. Dude played that roll WELL!
Um...we know Mr. Jackson was Black dude. Okay...getting corny and those pants are TRAGIC on him! "WE" shared him with everyone? WHO THE FUG IS WE?
Imma need Jamie to stick to the script from three days ago BEFORE Mr. Jackson left.
Seriously. Sitting up there looking like Wanda with her wig blown off.
Sometimes there are things in my inbox that I think I'd rather yall not send me. The following video is one of them. I'm only posting it to make sure you don't know any of the lil KNUCKLEHEADS in the dang video cuz if you do...Imma need their name, address, school, and church info. Imma go show they mama...hold em down while she beat em...then drive her to the church house while she goes in and asks for forgiveness.
I took this picture for Robby, of course! LOL! I saw Kenya Moore (Robby's second wife) and I was BLOWN AWAY by how beautiful she is in person. Like...you know when you see her in magazines and whatnot and you're like...so...she all airbrushed up. Um...no. You can't say that anymore. The woman is more beautiful in person. Really makes me wonder why her career didn't take off more in the world of beautiful people.
Notice how greezy the kid looks. It was already humid as HELL and it rained while we were in the premier so yeah...I was looking a MESS! By the way...I'm STILL only 5'9". That is all.
This dude is one of my favorite villains! LOL!
His girlfriend was like 6 ft tall and about 98 pounds soaking wet. She was rocking some of the baddest shoes known to mankind.
Imagine my surprise when I saw not one but TWO people I know from Louisiana doing it up big in the industry! GO YALL!!!!!!!!!
I don't care WHAT they say...guys gossip waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more than women. They just call it something different! LOL!
So...I submitted a script to the Nickelodeon folks that were going to be at ABFF and my script was one of the finalists chosen. I was invited down for this story telling thingy and then a script review with some suits from Nickelodeon.
The story telling was REALLY good and then we had a one on two with the suits to review our scripts. My review went like this:
Them: You are really funny and you captured the voice of the main character really well. The story was good too.
Me: (GRINNING BIG CHEESE EATING GRIN) Thank you! (All brightly and shit.)
Them: Now...lemme tell you what's WRONG with it so you can fix it.
And this went on for thirty SOLID minutes. PAGE BY PAGE BY PAGE.
And at the end? They gave me a one page typed up with my wrong stuff.
So I got my shit and rolled out going over in my head. I called The Robinator and told him and he gave me some words of wisdom. I felt beat the hell up. Like...BEAT DOWN WITH A LEAD PIPE! I went to get me a gelati and thunk on it and yeah...they were right. And hey..these are the people that are ACTUALLY putting things on the air so yeah...Imma work on this stuff BIG.TIME.
But initially ya girl was feeling some kinda way.
I recognized that this was the most valuable thing I have had the opportunity to do so far and I recognize that it's going to make me waaaaaaaaaaaaay better really quick.
Yup. I'm on it.
So for the rest of the festival I joined the regular and fancy participants. I hit the master classes and some symposiums and took in a few movies and a couple of cocktail parties. I met, as always, some FABULOUS people who I hope to stay in contact with and I continued to think about my beat down.
Fortunately I saw most of the other folks that were finalists as well and found they were beat down too. LOL! I felt better. The thing we all wondered was that if we were the best of the best and got beat down...DANG...what in the WORLD did the other scripts look like????????? ROFL!
I can't believe you guys are almost finished! I'm so proud of you!!!!!!!!! I read yesterday that Erica B. lost 5 pounds so far! Now she's been fit as a dang fiddle this year so I was surprised to find that she'd actually lost any. GET.IT.GIRL!
And G-Baby is dropping too! GET IT GIRL!
AGAIN...I'M SUPER PROUD OF ALL OF YOU! Now...show us whatcha working with today?
My Grandmother is quick to tell young folks that you can't say you know someone until you've been with them for all four seasons, been sick with them, have them be sick with you and take a trip together.
When I was young and dumb I didn't get that trip together thing but now that I'm old and dumb I know exactly what she means. See...when you're traveling with someone both of you are away from your comfort zone. Neither of you are around family and friends and you're usually with each other for the majority of the day when you're traveling with them. You're sharing a television, a small bathroom, etc. It's like...yall against the world. A world where no one knows yall and yall gotta do whatcha gotta do to survive.
I got yo back...you got mine.
What say you? Do YOU believe in the taking a trip thing? Did you ever travel with someone and was extremely disappointed in how they were on the trip?
I just finished hanging up the clothes I needed to hang up. There were 12 hangers in the closet. I noticed that The Robinator had hung up some of his clothes. I say some because he only used 4 hangers. The rest of his stuff was still folded neatly in his bag.
He left 8 hangers for me to use.
I just hung up my clothes and doubled up on a few things so I could hang up a few more of his things. Yeah...I know he doesn't care if his cotton collared shirts are folded and not hung...but I did it anyway.
To show him how much I appreciated his considerate behavior in leaving me 8 hangers cuz he knows his wife well enough to know that I'd have a need for more hangers than he does.
My husband is ridiculously considerate of me.
1. Having or marked by regard for the needs or feelings of others. See Synonyms at thoughtful.
2. Characterized by careful thought; deliberate.
Before I obligate myself with anything of significance I CONSIDER my husband. How it will affect him, our lives, our day-to-day Monnie and Robby. I would never do anything that would cause a major glitch in us without talking to him and considering all options. It's what we do ya know?
It's how we izzzzzz...
When we're driving and he gets a work related call I turn down the radio. When we're home and the same happens I turn the volume down on everything so he may get done what he needs to get done.
When I'm sleep he doesn't make a lot of noise. He's being considerate of my need for sleep.
Life is full of a whole lot of moments that make up minutes, hours, days, etc.
I hope you're not spending ONE MOMENT dealing with someone you don't have to who isn't CONSIDERATE of your needs. Hell...it doesn't take all that much to just THINK about someone you care about.
Life is too short to not be good.
What say you about consideration? Do YOU think it's important in a relationship?
Jill Scott is talking about her split with her fiance who is now nothing more than her baby daddy.
Yall know I love me some Jill Scott. I love her music and she's always made me FEEL like she was uber grounded as I always wished I could be.
I'm reading the comments on a site that wrote a post about Jill's announcement and the masses there seem to believe that Jill has fallen a peg or two because of this. They also say it's the reason stars like Erykah Badu, Jill Scott, Monica, Brandy (and any black female in the music industry) didn't get further in their careers because they lose public support after they get pregnant by men they are not married to.