I got a call the other day from a friend I don't get to speak to often. She's busy, I'm busy, we live clear cross the country from the other. I answered her call with a smile on my face and was promptly yelled at.
Her: If I find out via Facebook that you're dead I would kill you!
Me: Da hell?????
And she went on to tell me how the she found out a relative had died via Facebook and it pissed her off.
My friend isn't very technically savvy and she has kids. She's a mother, a wife, has a job where she deals with people and their problems all day and sometimes nights. She lives a pretty insular life. Protected you know? Like...she gets her news...from watching the evening news and by the time she hears about stuff...it's "old news" by today's standards of data delivery.
So I tell her that she probably wouldn't hear of my death via Facebook because she knows herself that she never gets on Facebook and that one of our friends who DOES use Facebook would probably call her and tell her knowing she wouldn't know.
Her: So, in essence, I'll find out via Facebook.
She felt some kinda way.
Some of us are far more connected than others. We all know this. Some people who aren't on the internet or social media feel they are better than those who are thinking it makes them "deeper" and I wonder about that cuz I think I'm pretty deep and yet...I'm always connected. Via my phone, my iPad, my laptop. I have a hotspot which goes with me everywhere so yeah...I'm always connected and my response time is pretty immediate. I have 'SHARE' tools on my browser so if I'm reading something I can click and share it on Facebook or Pinterest, etc. I sit and I write and when my brain needs a quick break, I pop over to read something and then keep clicking until I'm satiated with procrastinating all the while sharing what I've read with the browser tool thingy.
And then...sometimes I just want to talk to people without TALKING to people and, on Facebook, it seems someone is always around.
It works exactly the way my brain works.
As I listened to my friend extol the negatives of Facebook I pulled up Facebook. I saw that a friend's daughter had gotten into the school of her dreams, another friend's Grandmother had "gone on to glory," another friend's son took his first step, and another friend's dog was sprawled out sleeping on their bed knowing good and well he wasn't supposed to be on that bed.
I smiled, liked, and offered sympathy and congrats accordingly all the while listening to the tirade against people not being "connected" to each other anymore and I thought about it but said nothing cuz seriously...I could care less if she uses it or not. I don't own it and I'm not trying to put her in a brand new Facebook blue car. Seriously. Social media is about the person and how THEY choose to use it.
I remember a conversation with her once where she called herself and some of our other mutual friends my REAL friends. "Not those weirdo's you met online." And she annoyed the fug outta me and got tagged cuz I know I've made some REAL friends from the people I've met online. FRAMILY even so yeah...don't go there.
When I got off the phone with her I realized that I don't really know much about her other than what I used to know when I lived in the same area she lived in and we saw each other regularly. I know she has kids but, frankly, I forget their ages, grades and sometimes names. I haven't seen or heard her speak of her husband, other than in passing, for about 13 years or more. Nor her parents. I don't know if she's been promoted, is with the same company, what she drives, the kind of food she likes, any of her interests or hobbies outside of what I USED TO KNOW.
But she's my friend and whenever I do talk to her or I do see her we fall right back into that easy, familiar ebb and flow of personality.
And it just made me wonder if I even needed to consider or compare anything she says at all because truthfully...she's not going to change her stance on social media and hell...I DO WHAT I WANT...so there is truly no need to dwell on it any further right?
I guess what I'm trying to say is that...I feel like people who want to condemn Facebook's usage to it saying something about a disconnection of people makes me wonder exactly where they feel that disconnection is coming from and maybe...just maybe...they should consider that the type of friend they are to someone isn't dependent on HOW they continue to be connected unless it's always negative.
Shit...I prolly just said a bunch of nothing.
Holla if you hear me. I'm being verbose for no reason at all I feel.