This summer I was somewhere with some friends enjoying life. We were sitting near a group of people who were also enjoying life. One guy was drunk.
And he was already obnoxious BEFORE he got drunk I'm sure.
Drunk guy decided I was going to be his BFF and kept trying to high five me and ish. I just wanted to have a good time with my friends so I wasn't trying to get annoyed and high fived him.
The ish got annoying.
Drunk guy's friends started apologizing for his behavior when drunk guy wasn't looking. I mean...he was just being annoying...not offensive...just annoying.
I was having a good time.
With my friends.
Then drunk guy came over and tried to sit in my seat...WITH ME with his hands on my shoulder and shit.
And SIP flipped the script within .0000000000000000000000000009 seconds and EVERYBODY started scrambling at once.
Drunk guy's friends got his azz and started apologizing and everyone settled the fug down. Someone offered me a drink.
Monnie in FULL SIP MODE: I can buy my own damn drinks. Keep his azz over there before he gets flipped into that damn pool.
I'm trying to have a good time. Not trying to spoil it for anyone. I'm enjoying myself I'M ENJOYING MYSELF GOT.DAMMIT I'M ENJOYING MYSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I go to the bathroom.
When I return...drunk guy has realized the cool chick finds him repulsive and HE starts apologizing.
Monnie in FULL SIP MODE: Cool...let it go. We're good.
But drunk guy's remorse is deep and he CAN'T let it go.
Fucking drunk guy ruining my $20 a drink buzz. UGH!
And then...drunk guy made it about race and I decided to set him straight.
Drunk guy: You won't accept my apology because I'm White. But I'm a nice, Jewish White guy. We are not racists. My dad and all of his friends marched for civil rights.
SIP: DID THIS MF JUST GO THERE?
I took a deep breath, looked at him and smiled sadly and he melted feeling immediately sorry he'd said something so stupid. He opened his mouth and closed it. I didn't say anything. Just looked at him with a sad smile.
He walked away shamed.
Dude...I wouldn't care what color you are. When you're acting like an azz...you look like an azz. Amazing how yall all start resembling each other when in azzhole mode.
How would YOU have handled? Are you surprised at how I handled? Or...more importantly...SIP? Don't all drunk guys resemble each other no matter their skin color?