Okay...BREATHE PEOPLE...BREATHE!
BREATHE PEOPLE BREATHE! MR. SAM FINE IS COMING TO DC TO TEACH A CLASS ON MAKEUP AT BCI AND WE WILL HAVE PERSONAL ACCESS TO HIM TO SHOW US HOW TO BEAT OUR FACES LIKE THE SIDEWALK ON CONNECTICUT IN DC PROPER!
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Do you remember your 16th birthday? What did you do? Did you have a party? Did you get a special gift?
Nintendo contacted me recently because they know we like like to keep it fun, funky and fresh over here. They have a new product out and wanted to know if I wanted to come try it on for size. I said hell yeah and when they told me I could bring The Usual Suspects...I was like...SUPER COOL!
Yall know we like to have a good time.
Well...they sent this REALLY cool Chica down to meet with me a few weeks ago and we sat and chatted for a few and decided on some dates for a really FABULOUS fun party! I only had a certain amount of people I could invite and well...I had to stick with the crew of course. Yall know how we do. We ti-zight.
ROFL!
Well...today I was sitting here hacking up a lung thinking I had THE PIG MAN! THE PIG! and my doorbell rang. I went to the door and my friend Mr. FedEx was there. He's my friend because I shop and he delivers. LOL! Hey...I'm a typical housewife in some areas.
BUT...I wasn't expecting anything. Tomorrow...yes...today...no.
Imagine my surprise to find it was a gift from Nintendo with a DSi in it and a game for older, FABULOUS folks like Robby and I, Brain Age2. GO ME! FREE STUFF ROCKS! (Feeling some kinda way they know I'm old though. Humph...why I couldn't get a Ms. PacMan game or something? Wait...I guess that tells my age too huh? ROFL! I don't care WHATCHALL say...Ms. PacMan was soooooooooooooo hot back in the day! ROFL! But I digress...)
Basically they were just saying hey...your party is going to rock...we think you're cool...here is something cool for you to play with until we wear yall out with the Wii Fit Plus! ROFL!
So I charged up the bit of fabulousness and took it with me to the doctor's office. I sat in the corner with my anti-H1N1 mask on and set it up but when I got to the voice recognition part...I kinda couldn't do it then cuz you KNOW I wasn't taking my mask off right? RIGHT!
The kid is in DEFENSE mode.
When I got home I played with it some more and found myself playing Rock, Paper, Scissors even though I haven't played in a coon's age. (Why do old folks say that? Wait...there I go with the old stuff again. Sheesh...see...they knew what they were doing sending me some brain exercise huh? ROFL!)
Hey...I know I'm rambling cuz I'm all high on this cold medicine and can't WAIT to go to bed but I'm still sitting up trying to play this game. Yall KNOW I'm competitive and I'll be DAMNED if Dr. Ryuta Kawashima doesn't think I'm a brainiac of the BRAINIEST of proportions!
NERD GIRLS RULE!!!!!!!!!
This thingy is soooooooooo cool! It has cameras and mics and music just dinka-dinka-dinking along. Me likey MUCHO! E was trying to be all nonchalant about it like...Eh...whatever T-Monnie...don't think you're all cool and whatnot now.
Whatever playa...I'M COOL!
THANKS NINTENDO! YALL ROCK!(Um...yeah...insert that lil man's voice in here from the pharmaceutical commercials with the disclaimer stating that yeah...I got it for free and just because I think it's cool and whatnot...I still got it for free so don't be trying to say T-Monnie told you to do nothing bout nothing and nobody cuz again...I got it free. Yes...I'm throwed the hell off but I'm not ABOUT to get sued. ROFL!)
Is this something YOU would use? Do YOU think about exercising YOUR brain? What kind of games would you be interested in if you had one? You KNOW I'm going to need to add to my arsenal right? RIGHT! (Wait...can it be called an arsenal if you only have ONE of something? Prolly not huh? ROFL!)
Facebook Status of "friend:"
_____ is trying to learn how to put herself first. Any tips?
She received a few good comments that made me smile knowing she has some good people on her friend list:
1. Take a mandatory 1 hour a day doing what you want to do (eat ice cream, catch up on your fav magazine or go get a mani/pedi).
2. LOL Kelli...not only knowing but USING the word "no" is the first step
Not feeling guilty about using it is the second
Not needing to use it anymore is the third3. Make a list of everything you want to do and just do it! No apologies, no excuses, no guilt! Once you get used to putting yourself first, you won't go back!
My response was simple. To the casual observer...the simplicity may seem flippant but it's oh-so-true.
JUST DO IT.
Period.
I don't understand this idea that anyone should be better taken care of than you by you. I mean yes...I understand the concept of putting your children first and why so that's a given but even as a parent...you need to find that space to be solid with you cuz without it...you won't be solid enough for others.
IN MY OPINION.
In Monnie-land I reign Queen Supreme. I've built a life for myself that allowed me to take the time I needed for me and it gives me what I need to nourish those I love. If I didn't have the kind of time to and for myself now things would get hectic but trust me when I say the last person that would be neglected would be me. When I'm dealing with something I hear the following often: "We don't see or hear from you anymore."
My answer to that?
I was giving me the time and attention I needed. I have a little extra time and attention to spread around now so what's up?
Cuz that's how I roll. I come before all others. I nurture myself before I even THINK about someone else. Might sound selfish or it just might be the building block missing in a lot of folks' stairway to happy-ness.
Reign Supreme in your life. Take the time you need to be all you desire to be.
Love you...mean it,
Monica Mingo
P.S. Do YOU reign supreme in YOUR life?
AND SHE GOT A TIFFANY NECKLACE!!!!!!!!!!!!! GO SHELLY BEAN GOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Prince Marcus had his dedication ceremony today which is considered Christening to other religions. I feel really awful because my card was something about 'Happy Christening' or something to that notion. I went to Taya's father's house and was totally in awe of the beauty of her family. There was a lot of love in that house man and it blessed me to my core. That is one well-loved kid.
To include his T-Monnie and Uncle Robby.
Mrs. Angie G.
I was getting gas today and the check in the car on the other side of the pump was on the phone while pumping her gas. She started pacing as she listened on the phone and then she burst into tears. Alarmed...I looked up.
"You are not going to talk to me like that again! I am not having it! Do you understand me? I am not having it!"
And she wailed and wailed and wailed.
While still listening on the phone.
Old girl was dressed in a really nice suit and shoes and she was pushing a status SUV. She looked like a woman in control of some things.
I got in my truck and left because the whole scene was odderific to me.
I don't understand someone talking shit to you in a way that brings you to tears and makes you respond in a way that shows you don't care who hears you and yet...you keep talking to them. Um...no.
When I was growing up there was a lot of emotional abuse going on. There were times my father would say some of the most horrid of things to us designed to break you down and make you feel like shit. As yall can tell...that tactic didn't really work on me. LOL! I considered the source and since I'd figured out that my dad was bat.shit.crazy...I wasn't about to let anything his azz said to or about me affect me in any way.
Seriously.Today, I count those experiences as a child as positives because it prepared me for dealing with things as an adult in a very positive way. See...I don't have a problem removing someone from my space nor do I have a problem getting off the phone with someone talking shit to me and making it a LATER FOR YOU moment.
I also learned that, even if I'm very angry with someone...sometimes it's best to just stop talking before I say something or they say something that it will be difficult to come back from because everyone has a different opinion of what is considered an insult to them and...I'm my father's daughter and know I can get nasty if I don't remember that I care about the person I'm dealing with.
I don't want to think of someone I know being talked to in a manner that hurts and I hope they know to roll out and have a straight up LATER FOR YOU attitude. Taking shit off ANYONE is sooooooo 1987. If you're an adult you need to recognize you have the power to do what you want and to give access to you to whomever you want to have access to you. Negative shit in 2009 is for the birds.
Move on playa...move on.
Do YOU know anyone dealing with emotional abuse? Do you wonder why they stick around for all of that? Have YOU ever dealt with it? How did you release yourself from that burden?
Hey Monnie and the Tribe!
I got married on Oct 3, 2009! These photos are from someone's digital camera at the wedding. My man is totally camera shy - so here's a picture of me and my man (from the side, lol) doing our first dance!
If given the opportunity to learn a new language...which would you choose and why?
cbean got here late Friday night and The Robinator and I scooped her up. We got up the next morning, had breakfast and rolled out to the museum!
I only know of one person who has had, quite possibly, a perfect life and even she is suspect sometimes based on some of the stuff that comes out of her mouth.
Or...better yet...
I only know of one person who THINKS they have a perfect life
Most other folks know they have issues.
The thing about issues is that we all have them. Those of us who are very in tune with ourselves know what our issues are and we aren't afraid to surround ourselves with people who will help point them out for us. Some of us need Cumbaya people...some of us can get with a friend who, while eating a chicken leg will use said leg to point at you while chewing and say..."You know you wrong for that right?"
Right.
One of the things that I'm learning is that people who aren't necessarily living life exactly right can give you some really good advice. That Aunt who is a gambling addict can most CERTAINLY go clean the hell off on you for going down to the casino cuz she ain't trying to have you live in that hell she lives in.
A man attempting to forge a relationship finally with his adult son can most CERTAINLY advise him on how to be a father because he knows how badly he fugged up and doesn't want the same pain for his son and grandson.
Most folks want redemption.
Most folks want to look at something they said and/or did and feel good about themselves later.
Most folks have a come to Jesus and even if they feel they've done more wrong than good in life...wish with all their heart they COULD be good.
Most folks.
Clarity in life only comes when you've been honest with yourself about your past. When you figure out there are some things you've done that, even as you wish you would have differently...you know that you learned from and know to never do again. With seeing these things clearly comes an honesty that you can most CERTAINLY claim even if you never utter your secrets to another soul.
And you know what? You don't have to. Keep your stuff to yourself if you wish.
Do what you WANT.
You don't have to blog about your past pains. You don't have to make some announcement. You don't owe anyone anything except yourself and once you're finally ready to forgive yourself and accept that you are human and that ALL humans make mistakes...things are going to start falling into place.
Never stop questioning yourself. Never stop striving to be all you can be. No matter your CURRENT circumstances...your life can change if you make a plan and follow through with the steps in the plan. I know you're tired. I know sometimes it overwhelms you...but you have to make the CHOICE to be better.
DO WHAT YOU WANT.
CHOOSE TO BE BETTER.
Hi Monica,
Today R and I got married!
It was totally an impromptu wedding, yet it was perfect. Held in his parents garden in Canada, it was the simplest yet most romantic event I ever witnessed. I married my soul mate today and it was beautiful. His parents are 82 ad 74 yet this morning when I woke I had a beautiful bouquet and fresh flowers in the garden. They amaze me.
I wanted to share because you, along with the rest of the tribe, are family to me. I'm so happy that I can't stop crying...that is not the norm for me. But Richard reminded me that he told me when we got married my heart would soften.
Love you guys,
Mrs. Michelle C.
P.S. By the way all of this was planned in one day including purchasing the dress :)
Have your dreams changed since the last time I asked you?
What are they?
What do you want to do?
What do you want to be?
WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY AT THE THOUGHT OF YOUR BEING ABLE TO DO IT FOR LIFE?
WRITE IT DOWN AND MAKE IT HAPPEN FOLKS!!!!!!!!!
Mondays are pretty important days around 13700. The beginning of the week always seems to need a bit of adjusting for us.
For starters...it's usually my day "off." What that means is that I usually do NOTHING. No working out. No laundry, no picking up. NOTHING.
It's also a no-meat day for us. From breakfast on...no meat. Only veggies, grains, nuts and fruits.
To wind it all down...it's our go-to-bed-early night. Yup. Like VERY early. We eat our light dinner, talk, watch Olbermann and bed time for Bonzos.
Mondays at 13700 are for rejuvenating.
Do YOU have a rejuvenating day scheduled for you or YOUR household?
I heard someone say this today and I sat back and thought about it. The person talking was disappointed in how something ended up being pushed up against a VERY important deadline because of some missteps of the team they were a part of. They almost didn't get to do what needed to be done but pulled it off via a hail mary pass at the goal from way behind half court.
But they got done what needed to be done by not giving up and using every resource available to them.
After the person realized their hail mary pass made it...they exhaled and continued on with the rest of the day with a sense of championship. Like they won something big. Huge even. Like they pulled it all together hero style.
And that made me wonder.
I woke this morning and stretched.
AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!
And then The Robinator came in and hugged and kissed me. Told me he loved me and then told me something he usually switches up every morning to tell me. "You're my favorite person in this room right this minute."
LOL!
Our love is different. It's full of sarcasm and noogies.
Seriously.
I'm wearing my favorite t-shirt today. I've been up and at em since really early and as I stood in my closet deciding what to toss on...I figured I needed a bit of Ninja power to get me going.
Shelly gave me this shirt a few years ago knowing my fascination for all things Ninja and my ridiculous sense of humor that sometimes...only she gets.
It made me smile when I opened it and I don't wear it often because I want to own it for a very long time. Hence...it's one of my SPECIALES OF SPECIAL things that I own.
I have a hat box that has a bunch of clothes in it. You'd pull them out and think to yourself...DA HELL MONNIE DOING THIS WITH CRAP????? You'd prolly stand there with your nose all scrunched up and holding the items between your index finger and thumb and then I'd roll up on you and see you fingering them and karate chop your azz in the back of the head.
GETCHO HAND OUTTA MY POCKET!
When I left my parents home (sounds all lovely and ish huh like I was going on a tour of Europe for the summer) my mother overcompensated by buying me lots of clothes, especially pajamas. I don't know why pajamas really. I think she liked to think of me in cool, crisp cotton sipping on lemonade or something...trying to paint a picture that was the antithesis of why I was forced to decide to never return to their home again. In that hat box are several slips (seriously...she had a thing about slips) and two pair of ridiculously small pajamas. One pair pink and white stripe and the other blue and white checked. Both pair are long sleeve but made out of the softest of crisp, cool cotton that isn't crisp anymore. Traditional looking pajamas with a collar and a lapel with a breast pocket and buttons down the front.In the waistband and collar of these items? My name. My ENTIRE name.
Written in permanent marker in my mother's handwriting.
When I was in New York last summer the mail came while I was at Mr. Lee's office and someone called my name. I walked over and was handed a piece of mail. I'm like...DA HELL??????? I turned it over and saw our home address engraved on the back of the envelope. Envelopes that I had painstakingly pondered so as to choose the right personalized stationary for my husband. Inside there was one of his simple embossed note cards and in his handwriting was the following:
You are on your way! Love you, The Robinator
In short...these are a few of the things that can always make me smile and remember that I have always been cherished and loved by my family and friends. And when I say they are a few...seriously. I have stuff from Cojoe, Weezy, Dr. Punkin, Prince Myles...everyone I love with all of me that would be the things I'd mourn the most if I somehow lost everything due to tragedy.When I think about stuff like this I realize that I must be pretty well grounded about life based on the things I consider my treasures. I didn't say not one piece of jewelry (I'd prolly be wearing my mother's pearls. LOL!) nor did I mention not one bag.
Wait...um...erra...not one bag?
Shit...I must be delirious. DELIRIOUS INDEED! I have vintage status bags! That can't be replaced! Wait...hold up...I'll be back...
(SIP: Told yall her azz is bat shit crazy! It's like three people live in her dang head PLUS me! Humph. Just CA-RA-ZY!)
Name three of YOUR most cherished items? Why do you cherish them so?Based on that...my life POST parents has been all about doing what I wanted to do.
Because of circumstances, experiences and exposure, what I've wanted to do changed and changes. Sometimes I've not given a damn if I was doing the right thing or not and then, fortunately more often than not, I've ONLY wanted to do the right thing.
Especially the right thing for me.
I look at people who are always contradicting themselves as to what they feel they deserve and I wonder when the natural ebb and flow is going to come in. When will they recognize that yeah...they are good enough to want the best for themselves and to only be around people who want the best for them. I wonder when they will get tired of kicking it with people who don't add any growth to their life and instead, keep them exactly where they are or worse...bring them down more.
I guess it must be just that hard.
I like challenges. I like attempting to push myself farther and farther to being the person I want to be and I wonder if that is only regulated to someone who is in their mid-thirties and beyond. I wonder if it takes the glance back over your memories to realize that days keep coming and going, keep coming and going, keep coming and going...
And where you are...is where you're going to be.
May 14, 2009
UPDATED RESULTS! You guys have REALLY come through for the cause! I can't believe we're almost at our goal of $2,500 raised! This is that feel good feeling that I love to have. IT ROCKS!
______________________________________________________________________________________
April 15, 2009
HEY YALL!
As most of you know...I, Monica Mingo, am a breast cancer survivor along with my Aunt V, my mother-in-law and my surrogate mother.
As my friends and family we play together in real life and online, have lunch and dinner together and fellowship in just about every way possible. How about we do something important together, like help end breast cancer? I'm putting together The Tribe Team to walk in the Komen Global Race for the Cure and I'm hoping you'll join me in honor of all the women we know and love who have had to deal with breast cancer and in support of all those who may be touched by it in the future.
More than 50,000 people will gather on the National Mall in Washington, D.C. on June 6 to take a stand in the global movement to end breast cancer forever and I think we should do our part as well. As our President tells us time and time again...we need to get involved in SOMETHING.
No matter how you get involved, the important thing is that you are joining us in the global movement to end breast cancer.
I thank each one of you personally for taking the time out to read this and to consider participating by either walking with us, donating, or, hopefully, doing both. I beat cancer a long time ago. Let’s get together and make a difference for others. It’s the right thing to do.
Click here to donate so I may continue to exceed my personal fundraising goal: Monica Mingo
Click here to join our team to walk: The Tribe
Smooches,
Monica Mingo, Survivor
What do you think of Vision Boards? Do you have one? This is my fashion inspiration board from Isaac Mizrahi's site. It's about clothes, of course. :) It's my only one.
When you come here and see pictures...in most of them I'm smiling. Happy. You see me surrounded by my family and friends. In my husband's arms. Wrapped up with my doggies. Experiencing new things.
You see me living.
Am I happy?
Yes.
Have I always been?
No.
Do I ever get down?
Of course, of course, of course.
Once upon a time I was in an extremely dark place. I was hurting so bad I never thought I'd get to the other side of the pain. I hid from the world and dared it to interfere. I realized I had to morn. That I couldn't continue to pretend that it didn't all happen and that my life wasn't what it really was which was a big ball of pain that wrapped everything I touched.
Some lessons have been around for years and yet...still need to be repeated time and time again:
There once was a shepherd boy who was bored as he sat on the hillside watching the village sheep. To amuse himself he took a great breath and sang out, "Wolf! Wolf! The Wolf is chasing the sheep!"
The villagers came running up the hill to help the boy drive the wolf away. But when they arrived at the top of the hill, they found no wolf. The boy laughed at the sight of their angry faces.
"Don't cry 'wolf', shepherd boy," said the villagers, "when there's no wolf!" They went grumbling back down the hill.
Later, the boy sang out again, "Wolf! Wolf! The wolf is chasing the sheep!" To his naughty delight, he watched the villagers run up the hill to help him drive the wolf away.
When the villagers saw no wolf they sternly said, "Save your frightened song for when there is really something wrong! Don't cry 'wolf' when there is NO wolf!"
But the boy just grinned and watched them go grumbling down the hill once more.
Later, he saw a REAL wolf prowling about his flock. Alarmed, he leaped to his feet and sang out as loudly as he could, "Wolf! Wolf!"
But the villagers thought he was trying to fool them again, and so they didn't come.
At sunset, everyone wondered why the shepherd boy hadn't returned to the village with their sheep. They went up the hill to find the boy. They found him weeping.
"There really was a wolf here! The flock has scattered! I cried out, "Wolf!" Why didn't you come?"
An old man tried to comfort the boy as they walked back to the village.
"We'll help you look for the lost sheep in the morning," he said, putting his arm
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