This comment was left on the following post yesterday: "Cherished"
Now...she ask...so I guess yall are gonna tell her huh?
All I want to point out is that every man to include my father has cherished me and that Robby is the first white guy I'd ever dated. That said...yup...every other man has been BLACK. That's all I'm saying.
Please remember to be respectful and that just because I'll be traveling when you read this does NOT mean I will be traveling all day. :)
I am not sure if you read old posts but if so I would like to hear your thoughts on this.I have often thought about how my experiences in life have shaped the type of guys that I tend to attract. I have always been pretty independent and for the most part taken care of myself. My mother was a single mom. My dad never worried about me and always believed that I could take care of myself. I remember my dismay when, during my last year of college, I got stranded at Logan airport, after missing the last bus to where I was going and on top of that learning that the check that my dad gave me bounced and I had no money and nowhere to go.
I called my dad to ask for help. His response was "did you ask me or tell me that you were going to boston?"
I hadn't.
He then said. "then you figure your own way out." It hurts even now to think about how devastated I was that he didn't help me. I ended up spending the night with one of the porters (who thank God wasn't an ax murderer)who also gave me money to catch the bus the next day. So what did I learn from all of that? I learned to be tough. I learned to survive. I learned that I didn't need anyone to take care of me. I also learned about the kindness of strangers.
So what does that have to do with the price of eggs in China? I feel that because of my life experiences I attract guys that feel pretty confident in my ability to take care of my self and do not worry about me. Should I need a man to ?
The men I meet are for the most part gentlemen, kind, compassionate but they don't dote on me the way you are describing. I talked to one of my friends and she thought that it was a black thing and that black men are socialized to believe that black women are super strong, independent and don't need a man to take care of them and so they are less likely to than their white counterparts. There is the stereotype that white men with black women treat them like princesses.
What do you think? Do I need to be doted on and cherished? Is this a white/black thing? If you didn't see this growing up how do you get it into your head that this is how the world is supposed to be? If your man isn't this way because he doesn't know how to be this way then what? what others have to say.
i wish you could re-post this blog i am curious to hear
for the record-roslyn is so wise. so wise. I love reading her posts
