On Friday night I was packing The Robinator and I up for a much needed trip to the beach. We'd had it planned for a couple of months to join his family for 4th of July just chillin and we were way excited! WAY EXCITED!
I was on the phone when I noticed things changing outside and not in a good way. I yelled for The Robinator and we started buckling down. We'd never seen anything like this. Seriously.
This thing ran straight through our neighborhood like a train and I was seriously shocked at how quickly it cropped up. Like...it came out of NOWHERE. Trees were parallel to the ground, wind 60 MPH, hail, thunder, lighting, rain, etc. SO, SO, SO, MUCH! Derecho storm.
And then the lights went out.
Since we keep it ridiculously cold at 13700...the lights going out didn't mess up our sleep. It was still "normal people cool." Not 13700 cool mind you...but okay...we can deal.
We went to sleep in the dark and The Robinator said, "All we need, ever, is me and you."
I agreed.
We got this.
Lights didn't come back on by the next morning and we started thinking of alternative plans because of Bayou Prince Jaru and Diamond Sky Lucy. Just didn't seem right to leave our home AND our doggies to someone taking care of them without electricity when Pepco's stankin' azz was talking about a multi-day outage.
*sigh*
We called the airline to change our tickets to Monday and got a shocking update. We paid cash for Robby's ticket and used miles/points for mine. Robby's ticket would cost an ASTRONOMICAL amount to change. Mine? Nothing because of my status level. Robby was like...I'll stay. I was like...you're getting on that plane and I'll meet you Monday.
See...it was HOT! And when it's hot...neither The Robinator nor I are very charming people and I'm just keeping it real with you. He can be a dick and I can be an azz and when it's hot as hell...BAAAAAAAAAAAABY...me and him against the world turns to YOU GOTSTA BE FLIPPING KIDDING ME! SHUT UP! NO YOU SHUT UP!
Okay...okay...so yeah...we decided he'd go and I would come on Monday. My rationale was that I could camp out on someones sofa WITH electricity and we all know he wouldn't. He huffed and puffed and damn near blew the house down but yeah...he got on that plane.
And I returned to 13700 and hit the movies. (Gotta tell yall about that later.)
And I powered down.
And I powered down.
I went to sleep knowing it was too damn hot for words. Jaru and Lucy kept panting and I was really worried about Lucy seeing as though she's old and whatnot but they were soldiers.
And I kept calling Pepco.
The next morning I called Pepco again and learned they were thinking it could last until Saturday.
Me: *BLINK*
SIP: DA HELL????????????????
So I rolled out to deal with the situation cuz I'm grown and that's what grown folks do. I rolled out and dropped Jaru and Lucy off to Tsiaporah and E and started the quest to alleviate a potential WEEK.LONG power outage.
But first I needed breakfast.
And then I needed gas.
I had to drive FOREVER.EVER.EVER.AWAY to get gas.
And I'm still mad about that.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
Once I got gas I went to find a generator. I was listening to WTOP and they mentioned the stores which had generators and I made a beeline to get one. I showed up at 11:00am with about 60 other heat shiny people, paid and was told the truck would arrive with it around 1:00pm. So I hung out in the mall and charged my internet hotspot and cell while waiting on the truck.
Once the truck got there we all lined up (orderly at first...it seemed to pop crazy once those of us who were first got ours because those people left and returned in the heat and we'd elected to stay at the mall where there was air) I got my generator and, after listening to my fellow new-generator-purchasers I realized I needed to get small motor oil and a gas can.
The store was out of gas cans. COMPLETELY.
*sigh*
I was texting and talking to my neighbors the entire time and we came up with a good plan to make sure neither of us slept "hot" tonight.
Cuz that's how we get down.
So I started searching for a gas can.
No dice.
I finally found 1.25 gallon ones for $11.99.
I needed at least 5 gallons of gas to run the damn thing for 24 hours.
I bought two.
Figured the neighbors could find the rest of the gas to get us up to 5 gallons.
But finding gas?
PROBLEMA.
I finally found a gas station that had gas AND electricity and got in line.
A dude tried to cut in line.
It's too hot for all that.
I popped my trunk and hopped out like it was back in the day when I got down like that.
Cus seriously...it was about to do DOWN-T!
His ugly azz recognized quickly that the level of escalation about to pop off was not in his best interest and decided to act like he had some sense cuz really...we were all trying to be goodness and light and I'm SO proud of that. Well...goodness and light until YOU decided to take it to azzhole level cuz then...
N E WAY!
I got my gas and pulled up to 13700. 13702 came out and dealt with set up and installation. We did every.single.thing by the book and put power cords inside our houses and hooked up their air conditioning unit as well as mine.
And baaaaaaaaaaby...within 20 or so minutes...our basements were so cool it was AWESOME.SAUCE!
AND ALL WAS WELL IN OUR WORLD.
Especially since we all worked it out together.
I went got my doggies and we were posted up in the mancave relaxed and straight CHILLING!!!!! 13702 ran out to find us some din-din and I did NOTHING. I just wanted to lay around in my ice cold habitat. I walked upstairs and was FLOORED by the difference in temperature in the basement versus the other floors. Yall...it was HOT! Jaru and Lucy were peeping at me from the bottom of the stairs like...um...erra...no. We're good. You go handle whatever you're going to handle upstairs, yell if you need something. LOL!
It was so hot upstairs our hardwood floors were moist feeling. Just...UGH! I cleaned out the fridge and freezer and was estatic to find my honey baked ham bone was still solid double wrapped in aluminum foil and put in a Ziploc freezer bag. YEAH BABY! THAT BROUGHT ME HAPPY, HAPPY, JOY, JOY!
I took it over to a friend's house and returned to the hot azz house where Jaru and Lucy were posted up in the basement and I moved from my bedroom to the basement determined to live out the rest of this nonsense out of my basement.
We were down there chilling, feeling good. I was all "nappy" cuz the heat gets it out you and I was seriously just so very, very happy it was nice and cold.
And then...BAM...Pepco restored our 'lectric.
And I started dancing around 13700 like I'd won the lot-trie! My neighbors started cheering up and down the neighborhood and we all started shutting windows and flipping switches. I was so happy I swear I had every light on. LOL!
Long story short...it was one hell of a storm indeedly and tomorrow I'm boarding that plane to go kick it with my Robinator and our family on the beach. I require Pinot Noir the second I step foot into our living quarters and I should probably ask for jewelry as well.
Why?
DON'T ASK ME WHY!
LOL!
When I talked to The Robinator, I didn't tell him how bad it really was because I didn't want him to worry and I was determined to handle it and I did.
Now we know how to use a generator safely and successfully and we're ready in the event this goes down again. Now we REALLY have to get in that basement and make it do what it do to store it because, apparently, people be stealing generators even if you have it chained and locked down.
Whew! Lawd! So glad that's over!
If you're in the DMV...did YOU have an outage? How long did it last? HOW DID YOU SURVIVE???????
NOTE TO SELF: Buy 2 - 5 gallon gas cans for NEXT time.
