I have a question for you. Pretty simple question really. I want to ask you this and then...I want you to think about it thoughtfully.
When was the last time you saw a Black teenage boy on television? What was he doing? What kind of program was it on television?
The verdict in the "Loud Music" trial disturbed me, of course, same as it disturbed many others. Many say the prosecutor overcharged by trying to go for murder one and I guess I tend to agree. I know the DA just wanted to make sure he was seen favorably in public opinion but honestly...it was a stretch as we now see in the verdict and in the reasons given for the deadlock. Those are things out of our control. Decisions made by people above our pay grade. People who strive to do the best in a situation focusing mainly on the best for them.
You know...political gain and all that.
Have you thought about the last time you saw a Black teenage boy on television yet? What was he on? What was he doing? Was he an actor or was his image his real life version? Who was he portrayed as?
A while ago, some neighbors brought home their new baby. Around 10:30pm shortly after on a random weekday night, a wanna be "thug" rolled through our neighborhood blaring loud music in a BMW. He was coming to pick up someone who lived next door to the new baby family. The music was loud as hell and folks started looking out their windows and doors. Dude had gone inside to do something and left his car running, loud music and all. The husband with the new baby knocked on the door and asked that someone turn down the music. The wanna be "thug" ran out holding his sagging pants up with one hand, hopped into his car and turned down the music. He then turned his car around on the street all "cool" and shit and his friend jumped in and they took off.
All cool and shit.
When they got to the end of the street...you could CLEARLY hear him turn his music back up to ear splitting levels.
The "thug" driver was Asian dressed "cool."
His friend was White.
The neighbor? White.
The wanna be "thug" was asked to turn down the music he was playing inappropriately loud in a residential neighborhood by a homeowner who had a problem with it for a very valid reason. He knocked on his neighbor's door, politely asked that the owner of the car turn down the music, and then he went back inside of his house once the music was turned down.
He didn't whip out his gun.
He wasn't crazy.
Everyone lived to continue on being who they want to be.
Back when I was growing up...the fear of my parents rolling up on me doing something I knew good and well they would KILL me for doing...stopped me from doing a lot. I remember being told a story within the past decade of a woman who saw another woman's daughter cutting the fool on public transportation with a group of girls who rode the same bus. The women knew each other from church. The mother thanked the other woman for letting her know and made sure she was on that bus the next day. Her daughter had hiked up her skirt and rolled up her shirt. She was with 3 other teenage girls who, went to another school but lived in their neighborhood, talking loud, cursing, talking about inappropriately sans ropa stuff all loud and horrible pretty much being the most annoying passengers they could be. The mother rolled up on her daughter when they got to their stop and the daughter almost died when she realized her mother had been on the bus the entire time she was showing her azz. Everyone on that but knew how it was going to go down when they got in the house.
EVERY.SINGLE.PASSENGER.
This child's parents worked HARD to put her in a private school and made sure she had every advantage and comfort available as a suburban, middle class child. There weren't many who looked as she did at her school so it seems she wanted to stand out. This child decided to stand out by NOT emulating her mother and the other women in her family by excelling in school mind you...she took the other route. She decided to use what she sees in different forms of media being promoted as her means of standing out.
You know...how Black teenage girls act.
Wild, out of control, loud, sexually explicit.
GHETTO.
Because that's how we all are/were right?
Travel Diva and I were discussing the narrative we should use when speaking to the young Black boys we love about things like this trial. It was heated. We were PISSED. It went on and on because we were also HURT.
Here we go with this shit again.
I shared that we need to teach them how to recognize crazy and that they need to use ALL of their senses in order to get away from crazy and come home alive. Learn to diffuse situations of crazy by using their mouthpiece...learn how to talk a crazy motherfucker down.
"Easy there big fellow...easy...let's talk about this..."
Do whatever you have to do to get home alive. And then let the adults handle this ish properly. With police and lawyers and ish our hardwork affords us use of. Reacting to a crazy motherfucker with physical bravado might get you killed. There are other ways to react. You have other defenses at your ready. You're smart. You're nobody's fool. You might be in the car with your friends listening to loud music being perceived as a "thug" by onlookers but you don't have a gun because you are NOT a thug and you need to come home and finish studying for that chemistry test you have tomorrow.
Because you need that class to fulfill your graduation requirements and you've already decided on the college you're attending. AIN'T NOBODY TRYING TO BURY YOU JUST BECAUSE YOU CAME INTO CONTACT WITH CRAZY.
What do you tell young Black boys about this kind of shit without losing it? What do you tell them while being responsible? How do you check your anger? What life lessons do you give them during this narrative which will give them the additional edge they need so they know how to get those defensive mechanisms clicked into place properly so that they can learn to diffuse a situation and get home SAFE.
So yeah...again...when's the last time you've seen a young, Black teenage boy on television?
What was he doing?
What did he come across as...to you?
Was the last time when one of them was murdered and his picture was on the news? Is this the only time we see them in the media? Or rapping? Or playing sports? Who are they?
Do they frighten you?
Oh yeah...read this...especially how the comments start off:
Black History Month Isn't Making Life Better for Black Americans
What are YOU telling the Black teenage boys YOU love?